Waking up was difficult to do this morning. Again, the medicine knocked me out. I’m not taking it tonight.
OCIA was canceled today. Father C offered to teach it since I drove out for it, and one of my classmates was there already, but we all agreed it would be best to just reconvene in January when everyone could attend the lesson. The subject is the sacraments, so it’s important.
Please pray for me as I discern if the Catholic Church is indeed the truth. Please pray I figure out where I’m called as I reach out to the Lord and seek His guidance. One thing I feel uncomfortable with is confession. Telling all my sins to Father C, who knows me now, feels humiliating and daunting. A stranger would, in some ways, be better. In other ways, it would be worse. I like Father C, and he’s very kind, so in that sense, confessing to him might be preferable. But my sins are private, and it might feel safer telling them to someone who isn’t in our community and doesn’t know anyone I do or run into them. That’s paranoia, I suppose, but it’s how I feel. In college I joined a church for a while that asked everyone to confess their sins to at least one accountability partner. Then, when someone would leave the church, their sins would become public knowledge. It was culty. I refused to confess my sins, and that protected me from some of the malicious gossip when I left.
We leave soon for our trip! I’m very excited. We’re going shopping and going to a Cirque show, among other activities. Today we took A shopping for some new clothes.
Next month I teach a Bible journaling seminar to homeschoolers. I’m looking forward to it! I need to bring some traceables and plan what to say. Already I’m nervous! I try to remember that all I need to do is share what I love in a way that invites others to love it too. But that’s a tall order when you don’t often leave the house alone. It’s the getting there and the talking to everyone that scare me.
Life at Home 