Hear me out. Teaching kids to articulate their feelings is wonderful. But not all feelings deserve validation, and if you really want to prepare your children for the world, you must teach them when their feelings are or are not relevant. Recently I watched a video in which a mother of several children talks about how her youngest boy is her favorite and when he hits his sisters she just thinks he’s having a bad day. If my son were hitting girls, I would sincerely not give a damn what kind of day he was having. If he wasn’t having a bad day before he would be when I was done.
Teachers are quitting in droves, and it is because gen alpha is so horrid. Gen alpha are the children myself and my peers in the millennial generation are raising. Supporters of the parenting philosophy argue that it teaches children to be in touch with their feelings and validates their experiences. But only a narcissist thinks the world revolves around their feelings. I never became a teacher because I knew I didn’t want to take the kind of crap that goes on in the school system.
If little Timmy doesn’t want to play nice or do his homework, he should be met with punishment and teaching. Yes, punishment. He must learn that there are boundaries and where those boundaries are. Teachers aren’t there to coddle your children and tell them they’re special all day. They get paid to teach math and reading etc. And many of them can’t do that because the behavior of their students is so bad.
I have seen parents reasoning with tantrum throwing 2-year-olds. First of all, nobody in the middle of a tantrum can be reasoned with, regardless of their age. Secondly, the tantrum just needs to stop and it doesn’t really matter how little Timmy feels. Maybe being told to leave the toy store makes him angry, but you know what? Tough. No one cares, and the rest of us are sick of listening to sniveling brats tear apart stores and schools. If I’m Timmy’s mom, I don’t care either. I don’t ask my daughter to do things. I tell her to do them. And she learned from a young age that when I tell her it’s time to leave the store or do her homework or put something down or whatever, that it’s not optional. Hence why my daughter is a well behaved little lady. She was raised to respect authority.
Stop treating your children like they are the center of the universe. They are and should be the center of your universe, but they are not the center of the universe. Teachers don’t have time to work through the feelings of a class of 20 plus kids. They need to do what they’re told.
If you think gentle parenting is working for you, then carry on, but I would ask my child’s teachers. Because if your kid isn’t behaving in school, then your parenting isn’t working.
Life at Home 